The Real Meaning Behind Dispatcher BS (And Why It Matters to You)

If you’ve been driving a truck for more than a week, you’ll already know this: dispatchers and middle management will say just about anything to get you to do something you don’t want to do — usually for little to no extra money.

Here are some of the classic lines you’ve probably heard a hundred times from your dispatcher, along with the real meaning behind them.

The Greatest Hits of Dispatchers

(a.k.a. The Lines You All Know Too Well)

• “Yeah, yeah, we’ll have the load ready as soon as you’re empty.”
  Translation: Call when you’re empty and then we’ll start looking for a load.

• “You’ll never have to hand-bomb any freight here.”
  Translation: As long as you’ve got $150 for the lumper, you’re good.

• “We don’t run the Eastern Seaboard.”
  Translation: Until we get a paying load that way… then grab your map.

• “Call back in an hour and we’ll have your load ready.”
  Translation: Cross your fingers and maybe you’ll get lucky.

• “We pay the best mile rate in the industry.”
  Translation: After we adjust those miles on your pay.

• “You won’t have to wait to unload — back right in.”
  Translation: Enjoy that four-hour dock party.

• “If there’s a problem, call anytime — we’re a 24 hour operation.”
  Translation: Unless it’s after 5 p.m., then you’re on your own.

• “It’s first-in, first-out dispatch here. We don’t play favorites.”
  Translation: Unless you brought a bottle of Scotch.

• “We never run overweight.”
  Translation: Until you need to buy fuel and suddenly you’re a rolling scale violation.

• “You’ll have plenty of time to make delivery.”
  Translation: As long as you don’t need sleep… or food.

• “We’ll get you home for the weekend.”
  Translation: They just never told you which weekend.

• “We’ll have a good load waiting when you get back.”
  Translation: Hope you brought more Scotch.

• “It’s not a bad part of town. You’ll be fine at night.”
  Translation: Good luck, driver.

• “The customer is hot for this load — he needs it ASAP!”
  Translation: You’ll get there fast… and they won’t know what you’re talking about.

• “It’s only 200 miles from where you are.”
  Translation: Maybe it is as the ‘crow flies’.

• “There are no low bridges around there.”
  Translation: Except for the one right in front of you.

• “Anytime you’ve got a problem, come on in — we have an open-door policy!”
  Translation: Yep, come on in and we’ll fire your butt! .

To Be Fair… Not All Dispatchers Are Out to Get You

Some dispatchers genuinely try to do right by drivers.

But even the good ones answer to middle management, and they’re under pressure to make the company money — even when it puts drivers in a bind.

So What’s The Answer?

Keep track of what they tell you. Patterns don’t lie.

When you spot a repeat offender, call them on it to someone higher up in management. You may need to request a new dispatcher. Be sure to explain why.

At the end of the day, your dispatcher can make or break your paycheck.

A good one helps you earn.

A bad one can drain your sanity and your wallet.

Watch ’em.

Question ’em.

And don’t let anyone play games with your miles or your time.